30 January, 2006

Called Before the Commadant?

I just got orders to report to the Commandant of the Colonial Marines. I wonder what the he would want with me.

Maybe he wants me to tell him about that time I totally killed all those Xenomorphs.

Or maybe he wants me to tell him about the time I saved the Queen from an attack by Galactor while she was visiting Earth.

Or maybe he wants me to tell him about the time that I totally kicked Evil Hudson's butt.

One thing's for sure, I have to look my best. I have to comb my hair, polish my boots and make sure my gig line is straight. The General is going to see the best of the best when the H-Man steps through the doors to his office.

27 January, 2006

Mural, Mural, on the Wall

OK, check it out, Vampirella tagged me with this image game. Here are the rules as posted by the Ben.Run:

This tag is based on the idea of a wall mural. We start with a plain brick wall and people add something to it and pass it on. What you draw on is up to you. It can be related to your web-site. Preferably include your web-site URL in it. Each drawing does not have to be isolated from other peoples ones, overlapping images will look good. Try to use about 10% of the area.

The image is 400×300 and is a PNG file. Save the file to your computer and add in your artwork and post on your blog. Then tag other people to do the same. It is preferable to leave the file as PNG file rather tan convert to JPG otherwise the quality is going to suffer over multiple edits.



OK, tag history:

1. ben.run
2. Vampirella
3. Private Hudson

And who am I gonna tag? None other than my favorite bug-faced gun nut, Deadpool. Hey, Deady, game over! Ha ha ha!

25 January, 2006

I'm who?!!!


You scored as Cyclops. Cyclops is the team leader of the X-Men, and a skilled one at that. He loves Jean Grey very much. He's a strict and sometimes uptight leader, but he believes in his cause and he knows what he's fighting for... Peace between Mutants and Humans. Powers: Optic blasts

Cyclops

40%

Storm

20%

Wolverine

20%

Iceman

20%

Jean Grey

0%

Nightcrawler

0%

Beast

0%

Colossus

0%

Gambit

0%

Rogue

0%

Emma Frost

0%

Most Comprehensive X-Men Personality Quiz 2.0
created with QuizFarm.com

You know, I can't believe that I scored as this guy, he's a total whiny wuss bag. Everytime there's trouble he's all like "Oh Jean, save me!" and "What do we do now, Professor?" You don't see me whining when the situation goes bad, no sir.

Anyway, I guess it kind of fits because he's the leader, and I'm a leader in the Colonial Marines. I mean, sure, I'm only a private, but when the crap hits the turbine, I'm the guy everyone turns to.

I guess having those optic blasts would be kind of neat, too.

24 January, 2006

Challenge #5, If I was supposed to do a Meme, the Colonial Marines would've issued me one.

Jon picked me for this Meme thing. Let me show you how we do it in the Corps.

Four Jobs You’ve Had In Your Life
Colonial Marine
Colonial Marine
Colonial Marine
Paper boy

Four Places You’ve Lived
Born and raised in Texas
Boot camp at Camp Ermey
Stationed on the Sulaco
TDY aboard Galaxy One

Four TV Shows You Love To Watch
Big Bug Hunter
Bug Winkleman Hunting Show
Anything on History Channel
Gomer Pyle, USCM

Four Places You’ve Been On Vacation
Gateway Station
Fiorina 161
Arcturos
Earth

Four Blogs You Visit Daily
Intergalactic Gladiator
Lt. Cdr. Oneida
Vampirella
Mr. Sprok

Four Of Your favorite Foods
C-Rations ham and lima
MRE ham and turkey loaf
Autochef steak and potatoes paste
Mars bar

Four Places You’d Rather Be
Arcturos
Anywhere but LV-426

Four Albums You Can’t Live Without
Cadences of the Colonial Marines
Songs of the Colonial Marines -- The Colonial Marine Marching Band
Stay Frosty -- The Colonial Marine Honor Guard Choir
The Ballad of the Green Beret -- Sgt. Barry Sadler

Four Vehicles You’ve Owned
The Colonial Marines never issued me a vehicle, though I am qualified to operate the APC, Power Loader, Stinger XT-37 and Hovertread

Four People To Be Tagged
My X gal, Ranae
Totally hot senator babe Padme
White hot White Queen
Hottie hot vampire Vampirella

23 January, 2006

Challenge #4, Have a toy made in my likeness

I'm ready, man, check this out. I am the ultimate badass! State of the badass art! You do NOT want to eff with me. Check it out! I've got my trusty M41A Pulse Rifle and a spring-loaded bazooka that shoots plastic dumbells at the Xenomorph.

Hey everybody, don't worry, that metal brace on my arm is just the stedicam for the super sonic electronic ball breaker tactical nuke bazooka. That thing ain't no bionic arm -- my arm is as good as it's ever been. You better believe me when I say that the "Scorpion Alien" doesn't stand a chance against the H-Man. Say it with me: "Game over."

Alright, so the likeness isn't perfect. It's pretty good at capturing my rugged good looks and my "war face," though, so I'll let the inconsistencies in my uniform and pulse rifle slide.

OK, any of you H-Man Fans got a toy made of you? Sound off like you gotta pair! Ha ha!

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us


Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

20 January, 2006

Intergalactic Date-A-Palooza

Feel lucky, punk?
Hey, I went to the Intergalactic Date-A-Palooza, I think that I did pretty well there.

You can check it out Right here.

17 January, 2006

Good Hudson vs. Evil Hudson

Continued from here.

Evil Hudson and I squared off against one another and fired our weapons.

The walls behind us erupted from the gunfire, steam pipes ruptured, windows shattered, but neither of us fell down. We both fired again, but for some reason we both completely missed each other again. I guess deep down in my brain, I just couldn't shoot a guy as handsome as that.

We charged each other and swung our fists. Our fists collided.

"Oww!" we cried out in unison.

We swung again. This time, I connected with his jaw and he with mine.

"Yoww!" we both howled as we stumbled back.

"Hey Hudson," he mocked. "Have you ever been mistaken for a man?"

"No, have you?" I retorted. That'll show him.

We grabbed each other by the throats and started spinning around the room. Neither he nor I could get an advantage. It was as if he was an exact Mirror Universe duplicate of me.

We pushed each other away.

"Game over for you, pal!" we said to each other at the same time.

"Nuh uh," I said. "It's game over for you."

"No way, man," he responded. "Game over for you!"

We both kicked and hit each other's kicking leg. We swung again and missed.

I had to think of something, we were too evenly matched.

While swinging and dodging, I had an idea. I know the H-Man is all about the ladies, so I figure that I know what an evil version of myself would be like. We wrapped up again and I held him close to me and kissed him full on the lips.

Evil Hudson gagged and pulled back.

"I love you, Evil Hudson," I said.

"Oh man, that's sick!" he spat. "Queering doesn't make the universe work!"

He pushed back away from me and stumbled into the hot steam from a ruptured pipe.

He screamed in pain and stumbled away.

12 January, 2006

Challenge #3, Part 2, Taking up the good fight

So there I was, man, in the cockpit of Jon's ship the Danger Sled. I was itching for some action, but we were waiting in the launchbay of another ship ready to be fired at Planet Hel -- where the evil portal was sitting. I was all strapped in and I couldn't get up to do push ups or nothin'.


Jon was yappin' away with the technomage. I have no idea what that guy does, but he seems weird, man. Something about his character class I guess. I'm not into magic at all and I was never much for science, so mixing the two seems too far out there to me. I'm not prejudiced or nothing, I just prefer the company of the fighter classes, like Valkyrie, Paladin and Colonial Marine, you know?


We got the signal, Jon shouts "Time to rock!" and we launch.


Wooooo! This has got to the fastest launch that I've ever been in.



"We're on an express elevator to Hel, going down!"

11 January, 2006

Challenge #3, Save the Galaxy

My third challenge, Issued by the Queen of the Galaxy herself, is to go with Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator to the Edifice of Evil, vanquish Evil Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator, prevent further incursion into our galaxy, destroy the portal to the Mirror Universe, beat Galactor's minions and end the Evil Galactic Overlord's reign of terror once and for all.

Think I can't do it? Heh, all in a day's work for the H-Man.

Game over for Galactor's forces.


Edit:
Vampirella can't get enough of the H-Man. Oh yeah. Check it out.

05 January, 2006

Check this out

Playful Virile Treasure Hungering for Unrestrained Delights and Sensual, Overwhelming Necking

Oh yeah, ladies, the Sexy Name Decoder does not lie. I especially like how it says that I hunger for overwhelming necking, because I do.

Credit for this from Mr. Sprok.

04 January, 2006

Challenge #2, Dance Dance Revolution

I didn't want to do this. I didn't feel right beating a woman, no matter the competition. My dad always taught me to treat chicks with respect.

The challenge was sent though, and my manhood was questioned. Can you believe that? Vampirella and Lt. Commander Oneida dared to question my manliness.

Now, normally, I'm not going to let a couple of women yuck it up at my expense -- even two hot little numbers like them. But I felt that I had something to prove. Oneida's been riding my tail since that time we went out on a date.

Remind me to tell you about that sometime.

So, we're ready to Dance Dance, she's standing on her platform, I on mine. The machine counted down to go and the music started.

I danced my highly-toned butt off, but every time I stole a glance over at my adversary, there she was moving with speed and grace that words cannot describe. The song continued and I stomped on the glowing footpads, but she seemed to be a fraction of a step ahead. As if some mystical force was pushing her on, she stepped and slid and hopped without breaking a sweat.

The song continued and using the cuff of my utility shirt, I wiped beads of sweat from my forehead, Oneida's hair bounced like gossamer held aloft by invisible angels.

I danced. She danced. If we could give a percentage more into the competition, the machine itself would crumble away into a smoking heap.

We were almost done, sweat was pouring from my forehead. Determination and concentration furled Onedia's brow, but she did not sweat. As if she were the personification of some antiperspirant commercial, she refused to let us see her sweat.

I exhaled deeply, I stomped the lights, I danced with as much grace as I could, but with one false move, I stepped on the wrong light. I could not regain my composure and as the song ended, so did my chances at victory.

The song ended, I collapsed onto the railing, she heaved out a gigantic lungful of air and fell backwards into the waiting arms of the many people watching. I crumpled into a heap onto the floor, an exhausted, sweaty mess as Lt. Commander Onedia was raised up onto people's arms.

The crowd began to sing.

"We are the champions, my friend. And We'll keep on fighting 'til the end!"

I looked up with a pained smile. It was close, so close. I looked down at my feet, maybe next time I won't wear combat boots.

Game over.