27 June, 2006

Jo Jo, Portrait of a Sidekick Monkeyboy

Jo Jo, Portrait of a Sidekick Monkeyboy is a movie like no other. It is a movie that almost defies description. Almost.

As many people know, Jo Jo had a short but brilliant career as a sidekick, culminating with his work for Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator and the Intergalactic Gladiator Entertainment. There he aided Jon until his untimely face disintegration.

The movie itself begins with Jo Jo's catchy theme song, then follows up with his unmistakable and hilarious catchphrase "Howya doin' buauuuuth" (imagine the word "boss" stretched out and altered into it's funniest form), from there it gets a little odd because there's absolutely nothing happening for fifteen minutes after that. I quickly realized that it was an invite for everyone watching to pipe in with his or her own catchphrase. I haven't seen great audience interaction like that since Shock Treatment.

From there, it quickly runs through his humble beginnings, then settles in on his exciting escapades as a sidekick. He does some really neat things, like outrunning explosions, saving spaceships from exploding, outracing explosions, saving heroes, fighting giant monsters, creating explosions, and all other kind of sweet stuff.

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Jo Jo outruns an explosion!

This movie was written by Jo Jo the Monkeyboy's father, Jo Jo the Monkeyboy Sr., and his love for his son really shows in this movie. While the exciting moments will really rock you, the tender moments will move you as well. I think probably if there is one person in the whole galaxy that really understands a monkeyboy, it would be his father. This guy gets it, and it works, and that's really nice.

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Jo Jo outruns a boulder!

I have to say this movie isn't perfect, it's tough sometimes. There is a scene where Jo Jo is with a squad of troops who are all firing their pulse rifles at a giant bug on a ship (ugh, I hate giant bugs) and one of the guys fires 104 rounds from his weapon. As everyone knows, the M41A Pulse Rifle has a capacity of 99 rounds (though usually only 95 are put in to prevent jamming). Despite this glaring error, the scene is fairly exciting. You'll literally be on the edge of your seat at the end of it.

This movie works, it really works on all of the levels you want. It has the excitement of a summer blockbuster and the depth of a Garry Marshall movie. If you see only one movie about a dead monkeyboy sidekick written by his father and bankrolled by an executive in the IGE, make sure it is this one.

I give it 84 rounds.

19 June, 2006

I had a strange dream last night

I had the strangest dream last night. A Xenomorph wanted to kiss me. What could this mean?

06 June, 2006

My Battle Cry!

I totally got this from Jon. That suits me to a T. Game over.

What Is Your Battle Cry?

Running along the candy store, swinging a vorpal blade, cometh Private Hudson! And he gives an ominous cry:

"I'm going to flog you into the fourth dimension!"

Find out!
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